WHY WOMEN ARTISTS FAIL(ed)

I had deeply internalized all those negative, destructive messages and made them into my own beliefs that >I< was a failure, that >I< was the one to blame, and that >I< would ‘never make it’ – I attended an intense … Continue reading

DIZZY ON MY FEET

On a larger scale, there were a couple times I’d simply not be driving anymore. The first time that happened, I about lost it. How did I get home, sitting at my kitchen table… There are times in my life … Continue reading

HOW I REDESIGNED MY FUTURE

I threw out all of the first and second stage work — it was horrendous. I wouldn’t want my worst enemy to have to suffer seeing those designs on even his underwear. In January of 2021, I took a plunge … Continue reading

WASABI

You know those moments where an absolutely exquisite moment of silence descends upon a space before everything erupts into chaos all around you? It was 1966. I was 21. I was new to California culture, having lived back East up … Continue reading

HOW SAYING “I FORGIVE YOU” SAVED HER LIFE

Sitting like a little kid, with her legs straight out in front of her, she was shock-white, with glazed- eyes seeing nothing. The webbing between her left hand first finger and thumb … My mother and I got into a … Continue reading

SHY ARTIST DEAD TOO SOON

One day about a month before she left the planet, she turned to me with such a galvanizing look that I felt my feet suddenly get cemented to the floor. If I’d wanted to pay attention to anything else, I … Continue reading

GET UPSET? OR TAKE the OPPORTUNITY to UPLIFT?

Images flooded my panicked mind of internet police coming to Get Me and Punish Me, hoards of angry women descending upon my house and doing Bad Things to me, being banned from being online forever…. The first time a customer … Continue reading

The PAINFUL WAY I LEARNED ABOUT MONEY, Part II

I guarantee you that if you do not, they will hang around and expect you to do and pay for everything for them — just like you have their whole lives! Because my parents were so tight-lipped about money, I … Continue reading

The PAINFUL WAY I LEARNED ABOUT MONEY, Part I

One of the problems that exacerbated my naïveté was my dad’s panicky behavior around discussing money. As soon as the very word slipped past any of our lips, it was hammered into oblivion: “We don’t talk about money! It’s nobody’s … Continue reading

THINK, FEEL, TAKE ACTION, ASSESS, REPEAT

Despite feeling so insulted and so enraged, and so helpless to do anything about what had happened, I also knew I had to, could, and absolutely would, change How Things Were. After I got home from my sailing-across-the-Pacific journey, I … Continue reading

TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK

I’m not one to fill the space with a lot of talk or jabber — I’m really happy just sitting with someone in a companionable silence — there is something sublime and sweet about just BEing with someone you love. … Continue reading

LEARNING to READ the ENERGY

There was one point where I felt funny, and I looked over to see his face flash this weird face-video of emotions. I couldn’t read it, it went so fast. But I felt alarmed…. Right after George W. Bush the … Continue reading

VIOLATED. AGAIN.

I was astonished — I didn’t remember ‘screaming bloody murder’! I said so, and he laughed and said, “Yep, you sure was, and boy was it loud, yeah man!” Huh. The second time I was raped was a far cry … Continue reading

ELIGHTABETH, So Serioth

Granny made it very clear that she was disowning me because she thought I was a ‘sex maniac.’ Those were her exact words, conveyed with a contorted look of appropriate horror by my father. When I was a little kid, … Continue reading

HOW MY DOG FOUND ME AN UNEXPECTED FRIEND

…his voice was deep, gravelly. For some odd reason, I felt like I could totally trust him, so I told him I was just back in town, 54, no place to live, sleeping in my car, yadda yadda. Him nodding, … Continue reading

BEING TRUSTED BY SMALL CRITTERS

When I drew this, I was focusing on the white part so much that it wasn’t until later that I saw the funny blue face. I particularly like this one because it’s so silly (Silly really ought to be my … Continue reading

HOW BURT BECAME MY VERY BEST FRIEND

Burt is the kind of friend everyone should have. He holds little babies as if they were the gods’ own precious lights; plays with the toddlers; treats little girls and boys to merry-go-rounds, lots of colorfully illustrated books, pencils, and … Continue reading

WHERE DO THESE IMAGES COME FROM, ANYWAY?

I was surprised by this series of black, blue and white drawings. I’d been working on a whole nother series, and suddenly, these popped into my brain and demanded release. I can’t help it. I just keep seeing all these … Continue reading

PUBLISHED! INSIDE SECRETS: Stories I’ve Never Told Anyone: Volume VII – Stone Carver in Italy

I’m very pleased to say that my latest INSIDE SECRETS book, Volume VII, is now out and on amazon! All about my crazy trip to Italy to learn how to carve marble. You can get it in print here: https://amzn.to/41RZgk1  … Continue reading

BITTEN BY A SPIDER. OR NOT.

Instead of coming to the surface and breaking out, the itchy-burny-hurty toxins spread out into the rest of my instep and into my head…. A month ago, I was bitten by a spider. Or something. I don’t know, because I … Continue reading

MY BODY KNEW WHAT TO DO, EVEN WHEN I DIDN’T

The neighborhood women were complaining that I was ‘out flaunting’ myself, and their men were spying on me all day! After the big hurricane of ’82, my kids and I decided to move to a bigger place down the road … Continue reading

DON’T LET LIFE BLOCK YOU  -  EVEN HURRICANES

On a dark mid-November day in 1982, the boisterous, heavy-breathing Hurricane Iwa* swept in and wreaked havoc upon the island of Kauai, in Hawaii. (*pronounced EE-vah) I was a studio potter and stone caver. My kids and I lived in … Continue reading

The POWER of A PINCH and A TWIST

On a sunny late afternoon in NYC, I was on my way home from art school. Exhausted. We’d had a full day at the easel, standing on concrete floors, the instructors particularly nasty all day. As if our not knowing … Continue reading

THE REAL POWER

Last night, I happened upon a new show on Amazon prime called The Power. In it, young girls are discovering they have a new, odd sensation in their bodies — little courses of electricity that travel down their arms and make zippy … Continue reading

SUCH A BAD DRIVER!

After I left Italy, I went back to Hawaii, living there for about a year. More on that later. I then moved near San Francisco for a few months, until my friend Melissa invited me to come to New Mexico, … Continue reading

STONE CARVER, Part 6

Our first day! On a hot day in June, 1989, our carving group, comprised of five students all from the US, stood poised before the hunks of stone we’d selected, waiting for us on our sturdy, well-worn, waist-high carving tables. … Continue reading

STONE CARVER, Part V

Just by looking at people’s feet, I could always pretty much dependably tell who was American and who was European (or other nationality) before I even met them. Whereas we bumpkin Yanks almost always wore some brand of tennis shoes, … Continue reading

STONE CARVER, Part IV

Upon buying my tickets to go carve marble in Italy, I also bought a language system called Sybervision so I could study Italian. It was the easiest language system I’ve ever used. By the time I landed in Rome, I … Continue reading