I think I have mentioned that, for 35 years, I carried in the back of my mind, continual, persistent, destructive thoughts of offing myself. Wondering, how can I do it – pills? A gun? A knife? Drive over a cliff? But somehow my eternal self, the One that is the True me, kept me going.

At one point, I realized that I had to have been amazingly resilient and powerful to not just survive all that time, but then, to conquer those thoughts (with EFT, in 2001).

And I had to ask myself, if I had the inner power to be able to find a solution and then actually use it to conquer those thoughts, then what else could I do? What OTHER kind of life could I create?

I’ve done so many things in my life I’d have to write 5 books to cover it all. All through it, I have always thought of myself as primarily an artist. But when it came to marketing, making my visual voice stand out in the world, and be seen, and purchased? It has been as if I was at the bottom of a hundred foot-deep well, and instead of a voice, all I had was a whisper.

Yes, people do buy my work! However, the size of the volume or consistency of sales that would support me has always eluded me. I’ve almost given up a few times, I’ve felt so discouraged. How I ached for a steady income! How could I DO that?

Well, last week I found an answer – pattern design! You can create collections of designs and license them to manufacturers who print them out on various products – and you get royalties!

I’ve been creating surface patterns for fabrics for a long time – I have some of them on the website called Spoonflower, where you can upload your designs and have them printed on fabrics of all kinds. But I’ve never known how to do the business end of things, so I put patterns aside.

Hoohoooo! I found a course teaching how to do not only the artwork, but the biz end, as well! I’m so thrilled to have found it!

Now I can take up not just my old designs and run with them, I can do new ones – and know how to get them licensed! Imagine – one design collection, royalties steadily coming in every quarter! What a dream!

This is a dream come true! I’m imagining some of my funny monsters or little birdies or pretty flowers on your shirt, blankies or bathmats, or wallpaper or flooring! How fun would that be! Tiles, shower curtains, party paper, ribbons, phone covers… you name it! Look around – every pattern you see was created by an artist. One day, mine will join that crowd!

I’m so excited to be able to go through this course – I’ll post pix along the way so you can see the journey!

JOURNEY
Oils on canvas – 20″ x 30″
Original gone – contact me for a print